May's City Life

There is this guy I am seeing, well I WAS seeing till last night.

I met him about 1 month ago, and we started to see each other.

Well to be honest, he isn't particularly my type. He was pretty big built with dark hair, which i like, but he is about 5'9, and I'm 5'4 + high heel, so I'm pretty much same height as him.. And you know how I fancy tall guys.

But anyway, he was really nice guy and I thought i'd give ago even though there was no spark.

BUT...

Oh my got it's so difficult to go out with someone you don't quite fancy. I mean he is not ugly, and he is not bad guy. Although I mentioned about the height before, it isn't too much about the looks, but it's just combination of everything. How he speaks, how he jokes, how he laugh etc.

Anyway, I thought i'd just have some casual dates and see how it goes. Who knows? I may become crazy about him one day.. Well, I was hoping that day to come.

However, he was taking this real serious. 1 week after, he asked me to be his "official" girlfriend. I mean what is "official" girlfriends anyway?? Do I sign the paper? Do I declare that I'm no longer for sale? Do i set the status of my facebook to be "in relationship"??

So anyway, I said well you know it's a bit too soon, and maybe we should wait a bit more so it will be more meaningfull.

Well, he was ok with that, BUT he keeps mentioning about the word "girlfriend". and how he used is obiously to reminde me that I am his. For example, when we go for meal and i ordered fish, he says, "ohh my girlfriend wants fish!". When we talk on phone, i talk about the work, and he says, "wooooo I have a clever girlfriend xx!!" in really cheesey way. It made me feel absolutely uncomfortable.

Then he stares at me all the time, his hands all over me, and he wants to have sex with me every single second. Bloody hell it's way too much..

Then we had bit of serious conversation last night... Basically I have asked him to give me some space last week and see him in a week time, which made him feel really upset, and he had a go at me. He keep going on about why I don't wanna see him. I said I need space, but he just doesn't stop asking why why why. He says if he were me, he would still wanna see me even though he is upset with me. So he says i really dont get you.

Then today i just said hey let's just be friends. I like you bra bra, but not right for me. I haven't heard from him since then. I think he is mad at me.

I am thinking now though that maybe he IS right. Why don't I want to see him? End of the day, we were seeing each other only for 1 month. So it's a honeymoon period. I should be all over him, and I should be excited to see him, right?

So... I realized that maybe.. I didn't fancey him after all. Maybe I wanted to fancey him, but I couldn't. You can't fool yourself can you... You cannot be with someone you don't fancey..

So yea, I'm back in the shelf! Apply within ;-)